1995 River Cup Results & Controversies

Willow Oaks Wins River Cup VII; Final Score Still Undecided

Willow Oaks Country Club has beaten the Country Club of Virginia’s River Cup team to return the coveted trophy to its newly installed mantle in Willow Oaks’ posh men’s grill. The final score is still in question as one foursome remains on CCV’s Tuckahoe Creek Course. The score as The River Cup News went to press stood at 114½ – 41½ in favor of Willow Oaks with two matches still pending. Still on the course are matches between Willow Oaks’ Marty Donlan and CCV’s Chris Young, and Willow Oaks’ Tom McCandlish against former CCV Captain Jim Nelson. The foursome has just completed play at the par-3 14th hole.

The foursome is apparently being bogged down by Donlan’s stultifyingly slow play as he seeks to protect a 7 match win streak going back to 1991. Donlan is notorious for slow play, though long time playing partner Chuck Ditsler cannot recall any of his matches going this long. “I am normally able to speed up his play because I play so fast,” said Ditsler, “but he can bog down a foursome, that’s for sure.”

Donlan’s playing partners are clearly incensed that the matches are still being played some 54 hours after teeing off under warm sunny skies last Sunday. The players were forced to don parkas overnight the last two nights. “It was biting cold out there at about 2:00 am this morning,” said Chris Young during a lengthy interview as Donlan pondered club selection on the tee at the 518 yard par-5 12th hole early Tuesday morning.

Donlan won the front nine and is currently one down through 14 in his back nine match. In the other match, Nelson lost the front nine 2 down to Tom McCandlish, currently playing his best round of the year despite a triple bogey 6 at the third hole. “I couldn’t get used to Donlan’s pace of play,” said McCandlish of his errant play at the third. “We teed off about 10:30 Sunday morning and it was getting dark as we reached the tee at the 3rd hole. I’m not used to playing that slow. I just hope we don’t run out of food before this ordeal is over.”

A large crowd gathered at the 18th green awaited the conclusion of the match for several hours on Sunday, but gave up waiting at approximately 11:00 pm as a cold front moved through.

Warren, Augst Rounds Under Investigation

According to the River Cup Equipment Committee, Scott Warren’s round of 72 in Friday’s fourball matches is under investigation and will not be certified as a River Cup record pending the outcome. Warren’s 72 is two shots lower than last year’s record score by Jim Nelson. Nelson is Chairman of the Equipment Committee. Mike Augst’s record 33 on the back nine, highlighted by 5 straight birdies starting at number 10, is also under investigation, said Nelson.

Nelson said the investigation centers on the grips used by Warren and Augst. Warren and Augst are under contract to River Cup Club Works and were using clubs with grips installed by Club Works owner Langdon Moss, who is also Captain of the Willow Oaks side. “We believe the ‘bulge’ or ‘waist’ that Moss molded into the grips for his players’ clubs violate the USGA design specification prohibiting these grip aids,” said Nelson.

Discussing the controversy during a press conference after the matches, Moss said that he was unaware of the rules as to club design and grip restrictions. “Hey, I just started this operation. I haven’t a clue what you can and can’t do. I just thought that this new grip I designed might help Scott and Mike play a little better.”

Warren and Augst denied that the “bulged” grip gave them any advantage but were clearly upset with Moss’ lack of awareness of USGA design specifications.

CCV’s Will Scott in Hiding

CCV Team Member Will “Brother” Scott, who missed a 16″ putt before a large crowd at the 18th hole in Friday’s fourball matches, has gone into seclusion to avoid the public scorn heaped upon him by his teammates and the press. Scott’s match with partner James F. Nelson, former Captain of the CCV team, may have been the turning point in CCV’s crushing loss in this year’s rendering.

Scott and Nelson came to the 18th hole in their match against the Willow Oaks team of Dennis Ryan and Tom McCandlish needing only to halve the hole to win the match. Scott put his drive in perfect position in the middle of the 18th fairway. Nelson was out of play, as was the case throughout most of the afternoon. Tom McCandlish, playing his ball from the rough between the first and eighteenth fairways, wisely took two shots to play his ball back into the eighteenth fairway and then quit, leaving Ryan with the responsibility of staving off Scott.

Playing his second shot from 160 yards out in the fairway, Scott paused briefly to wipe off his brow, took a deep breath to steady himself and hit a six-iron to within 12 feet of the hole. Scott immediately dropped to his knees in prayerful thanksgiving as the large crowd gathered at the green anxiously awaited the outcome of what was already shaping up as a critical match in CCV’s quest to retain the Cup. Ryan played his second shot near the green and holed out in five, setting the stage for Scott’s colossal gaffe.

Scott needed only a two putt to secure a win for his team. When his first putt rolled to within 12″ of the hole, CCV team members shook Jim Nelson’s hand, congratulating him on the win. The crowd was stunned as Scott approached his ball awaiting a concession from Ryan and McCandlish, only to hear a deafening silence from the Willow Oaks duo.

Scott was obviously flustered by the lack of sportsmanship by Ryan and McCandlish and took several moments to compose himself over the twisting 9″ putt. Scott finally addressed the putt, only to pull off as he heard active wagering in the crowd on the outcome of the putt. Scott again took his stance over the ball, stabbed awkwardly at it and grimaced as it spun past the hole.

Scott stalked off the hole, refusing the offered handshakes of Ryan and McCandlish. Scott appeared at Sunday’s singles matches and put up token resistance in his match against WOCC’s Scott Warren, who has publicly labeled Scott a “creampuff.” “Hey, if the shoe fits, wear it ’til its comfortable,” said Warren after his 6-0 shutout of Scott.

River Cup Hall of Fame Inducts Moorman, Sinclair

The River Cup Hall of Fame inducted two new members this year as CCV’s George “Ear” Moorman and Willow Oaks’ Paul Sinclair were enshrined by unanimous vote.

In an interview with Moorman in a videotaped presentation, Hall Chairman Langdon Moss recounted Moorman’s many storied matches during his five appearances in Cup play. Moorman’s loss to Joby Klotz, another Hall of Fame member, was remembered for the “broken eyeglass” gambit which was unsuccessfully employed by Moorman in the 1990 rendering. Moss was himself a participant in Moorman’s famous “lost ball” match in 1993’s fourball play. Both those matches are much remembered to this day.

Moorman also recounted in the interview the genesis of the nickname “Ear.” “It seems I am a relative of the well known nobleman, Duke of Earl,” claimed Moorman. “The ‘L’ has been dropped over the years for brevity’s sake and so I am now known proudly as Ear.”

Moorman also recounted the life and times of fellow inductee Paul “Hair” Sinclair. “Paul is a gentleman of the first order,” said a clearly emotional Moorman during the interview. “I am proud and humbled to be considered for enshrinement at the same time as such a fine, fine gentleman. I am envious of his schooling at Notre Dame. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to get into ND – my SAT scores were too low. I settled for a junior college instead.”

Willow Oaks’ Eddie Eddins Feigns Injury, Withdraws

Controversy erupted on the eve of River Cup VII as Eddie Eddins, WOCC’s MVP from 1993, pronounced himself unfit to play in the foursomes competition. He subsequently withdrew from the singles matches as well. Citing a back injury sustained during a warm-up round at the Foundry with CCV’s Jeff Hudgins, Eddins hinted at foul play. “He suggested that I should swing harder…in case I should hit it. That Hudgins guy has had it in for me ever since our scouting trip to Scotland two years ago.”

Sources from both CCV and WOCC had other ideas about Eddins’ sudden ailments. “He felt fine until he found out he had drawn me in singles,” huffed Rob Leitch. “After the licking I gave him last year, he just couldn’t handle the pressure!”

Even Eddins’ own teammates speculated about the withdrawal. Dennis Ryan, a River Cup rookie and normally an unassuming fellow, had this to say: “All I know is, in the Club Championship, the guy folded like an American flag. I think he took a dive in the Cup.”

Speculation immediately ensued as to Eddins’ replacement, and there were gasps (and a few guffaws) when Captain Langdon Moss announced that Doug Urquhart, an untested twentysomething, would play in both the foursomes and singles matches in Eddins’ stead.

Urquhart, a 15 handicap, displayed characteristic bravado in declaring his ability to supplant Eddins in the River Cup. “I hear those CCV guys have such big egos, they post all their scores, even their good ones! No wonder they can’t win the big matches!”

Urquhart’s confidence proved well placed. In his maiden River Cup match, Urquhart played unevenly while riding on the wide back of Moss in foursomes, escaping with a half in their match with the Moorman-Westmoreland team. The best was yet to come, though, with Urkel pitching a 6-0 shutout win over a hapless Rob Leitch in singles play.

“I don’t know what happened,” mumbled a confused Leitch after the match. “Eddins, I want Eddins…” he was heard to mutter before he drove off dejectedly.

After the matches Eddins was reminded about the River Cup eligibility rules and the possibility that he might not get a bid next year due to his absence in 1995. “Are you kidding?” he replied. “I’m the heart and soul of this team! Moss would be a fool not to reinstate me. It’s a slam- yip… I mean slam-dunk. Dunk! Did I say yip? I meant dunk … Um, excuse me, I have to go practice putting now.”

Eddins’ selection to the 1996 squad remained uncertain at press time.

WOCC’s Stanley Ford Named Emissary to CCV in Slow Play Flap

Willow Oaks’ team member and Club President Stanley Ford has been appointed by the River Cup Executive Committee to serve as emissary in defusing a crisis arising from the slow play of the River Cup foursome still on CCV”s Tuckahoe Creek Course. (Lost foursome update: Young won the 15th hole to go 2 up in the back nine match. Nelson, Young, and McCandlish are having dinner while Donlan lines up his putt on the 16th green.)

Ford, known more for his negotiating skills than his golf game, has been given the difficult task of securing playing privileges for the River Cup at a CCV course in next year’s event after several CCV members complained loudly about being held up by the Donlan foursome.

Upon being informed of the appointment, Ford had a lukewarm response. “Are you kidding? I might not let this two-bit bunch of golfers play at my course next year either, even though I have now established a permanent position on the team for myself.”

North Berwick Selected as Host for 1997 River Cup

The historic West Links at North Berwick, Scotland, has been selected as the host site for the 1997 River Cup Scotland Tour. The course was given the nod over several other clubs which had submitted bids to the River Cup Tour Committee. Speaking for the Committee, Eddie Eddins indicated the West Links was selected as a result of incentives offered by the town of North Berwick to attract the River Cup’s much rumored tour. “North Berwick’s representative, Mr. Dougie Seaton, has offered to bunk us in his quaintly designed mud hut hard on the North Sea,” said Eddins. ” It was the only offer of free lodging we had.”

Seaton has lobbied long and hard to bring the River Cup event back to North Berwick, which was the site of J. Langdon of Moss on Thames’ first exposure to golf. Langdon later designed and built a course modeled after the 7 hole North Berwick layout and it was upon those holes that the first River Cup was staged in 1848, according to River Cup lore. The West Links is the site of one of the most famous holes in golf, the Redan hole at number 15. The par-3 Redan has been the model for holes around the world, including the par-3 17th at Shinnecock Hills, site of this year’s U.S. Open.

Seaton, an interior designer and editor of “European News”, published apparently at random intervals on the Internet, has also been selected to serve as River Cup Commissioner-UK for the 1997 event. Reached for comment in his study, Seaton appeared pleased with his appointment. “Ae hae bin lochin’ long and hard fer this,” said Seaton. “We’ll give ye Yank bastards a drubbin’, that’s fer sure. Och aye the noo.”

Current plans call for a two week tour in July, 1997. The first week will be comprised of matches between CCV and Willow Oaks teams at Carnoustie, Muirfield, St. Andrews, and Gullane No.1. That will be followed by several days of play at varied courses according to each players’ preference. High on the list of preferred courses is Royal Dornoch in the Scottish Highlands. Following that, a combined team from CCV and Willow Oaks will face a select team of Scottish golfers from the Tantallon Golf Club and the North Berwick Golf Club. These international matches will be played at the West Links Course. The format for the matches is still under consideration.

International interest in the matches is already high. Several television networks, including the BBC, the Sports Channel, NBC, CBS, ABC, and Fox are already preparing bids for submission to the River Cup Broadcast Rights Committee.

Dennis Ryan’s Eagle 2 at Tuckahoe Creek #13 Thrills Crowd

Willow Oaks’ Dennis Ryan sent a surge of excitement across CCV’s Tuckahoe Creek Course during Sunday’s singles matches with an eagle 2 at the 415 yard par-4 13th hole. Ryan hit a 3-iron that bounced on the green and jumped in the hole. With a handicap stroke on the hole, his net 1 was two strokes better than opponent Robert Mitchell’s natural birdie. It is believed to be the first time a natural birdie has lost a hole by two strokes.

While Ryan’s shot was well received by the crowd, most agreed it paled in comparison with the only other eagle recorded in River Cup play. “I was there in 1991 when Paul Sinclair put in a beautiful 6- iron for an eagle two at the 18th hole at Willow Oaks,” said Sinclair’s long time nemesis John Leitch. “And while it pains me to say it, Paul’s was a much more spectacular eagle, and it was critical in Willow Oaks’ win that year. Ryan’s didn’t mean anything at all this year. All in all, Sinclair’s is still the more memorable shot.”

Lost Foursome Update

Donlan/Young halve 16th hole. Young 2 up on back 9. Donlan currently pacing yardage to hole for second shot to 17th green. Nelson, McCandlish, Young are napping awaiting Donlan’s club selection.

Klotz is First Two Time MVP Winner for WOCC;
CCV’s Hudgins Gets Grudging Nod

Joby Klotz narrowly edged out a rash of other contenders for this year’s nod as Most Valuable Player for Willow Oaks. Klotz, whose River Cup career was on life support the last two years, stunned this year’s event by winning 14 of a possible 15 points. Klotz’ strong showing dispels rumors that he might be ousted from the Willow Oaks’ team next year.

Klotz was clearly ecstatic about his selection. “It looks like I’m going to Disney World again,” crowed Klotz. “I have been saddled with Langdon Moss in fourball all my River Cup career,” said Klotz. “I finally got out from underneath that load this year and it just goes to show you what I can do.”

Klotz played this year with Kent Puryear in fourball. The Klotz – Puryear pairing easily defeated CCV’s Rob Leitch and Ted Armstong 6-0. Klotz defeated Armstrong in Sunday’s singles matches 5-1.

Puryear was himself a strong candidate for MVP honors, staking his claim with shutout victories in both his matches. His singles victim was CCV’s Bill Cramme. Puryear’s chances for the honor were hurt by being paired against Cramme, a notoriously weak singles player.

Paul Strauss garnered several votes for the honor for his stellar performance in reading putts for Mike Augst during Friday’s fourball play. But Strauss lost support for his failure to attend the Reception and Annual Meeting, always a major factor in the MVP Committee’s considerations.

In a generally strong showing by all of the Willow Oaks’ side, others considered for the nomination included Scott Warren for his potential River Cup record score of 72 and Tom McCandlish. McCandlish’s bid was doomed by the fact that he remained on the course as the MVP Committee tooks its final vote for the award.

CCV’s exceedingly poor play in this year’s event left few potential candidates for this year’s MVP Award. Jeff Hudgins clearly outshone his teammates, winning his matches in both singles and fourball. Hudgins’ performance is a welcome change from last year’s two loss outing. Some Committee members felt that Hudgins should be denied the honor as his fourball victory was largely the result of partner Ted “Pajama” Chandler’s strong play. But as the only CCV team member with two wins this year, the Committee felt it could not withhold the award.

The MVP Committee has also added a new award this year, the “Least Valuable Player” Award. The Committee has awarded its inaugural LVP Award this year to CCV’s Cliff Culley, who failed to produce a point for his team. This represents a sad return to form for Culley, who went several years without a point during his early River Cup career. “Oh no, not this again,” was all Culley could say when informed of the Award.

1995 River Cup Top Ten List

Top Ten Things You Don’t Want to Hear at the River Cup

#10. I’ve never seen a ball hit there before.
#9. No, I didn’t see it come out.
#8. Now that’s a fried egg.
#7. Oooh, are you alright?
#6. I wouldn’t put my hand down there if I were you.
#5. Is that a duck hook or a snap hook?
#4. Hold perfectly still…they react to movement.
#3. It would have been your best drive of the day.
#2. It looks like you need to win these final eight holes to tie.

And the #1 thing you don’t want to hear at The River Cup

#1. You will be dining at the same table as Bill Correll.